Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Still Dan Brodribb. Tell Your Family I Said Hi

At the show yesterday, I was telling Sean Lecomber about my new approach to comedy and my frustrations at not always being able to make it work.

DAN: You know, I tell myself each time I go up, I'm going to do stuff differently. I'm going to be high energy and pump up the crowd, and then I get up there..."

SEAN:...and you're still Dan Brodribb.

DAN: Pretty much.

There's a moral in that exchange somewhere.

In other news, This is one of my favorite blogs.

If you enjoy voyeurism into someone's life and sexual dynamics, check it out. She's also a wonderful writer, which helps.

I enjoy reading it. It's been a springboard for some nice discussions with Bastet. I've occasionally wanted to write her a message telling her how much I enjoy her writing (Or worse, give her advice, which is doubly stupid considering what I myself wrote in paragraphs five and six of one of my own articles), but I can't quite figure out how to do it. I always found it disorienting when people who read my articles in the paper would come up to me and start talking about my personal life. Now I'm on the other side of the fence and trying to figure out how to show my appreciation without sounding creepy.

Let's try one out and see how it sounds.


My girlfriend and I love your blog. We love deconstructing your personal life and analyzing you in between Scrabble and trips to the Farmer's Market. We especially like it when you try and find your place in the world, so keep up those feelings of alienation. We need the conversational fodder.


PS - Tell your family I said hi

Hmm. I don't know.

Of course, I know she reads my blog, so maybe what I could do is write a post saying how much I like her writing but I'm uncertain about how to tell her.

And then she'll read it and send me a message going "I never know you felt that way. I like your blog too."

And then I'll be like "Will you be friends with me and my girlfriend?"

And she'll be like, "Yes, of course. I love your blog and your girlfriend's, which I magically found and identified, even though I have know way of knowing who she is or where I could find her blog because you feel it's intrusive to post anything that would allow anyone to identify your romantic interests to the casual reader. I like her. You two are a wonderful couple. I only wish I could somehow find the peace, happiness, and sagacity you two have found over the winding course of your life journey together."

And I'll modestly go. "Well, it's important to understand that these things take time. You can't rush them. Bastet and I have a special connection, true, but it's been forged in the fires of our--let's see what's the date today?--three months together."

And she'll be like. "Wow. Do you have any advice for me?"

And I'll be like: Well, I DO hate to give advice, but...(insert pearls of glorious golden wisdom here)

And she'll go: "God, of course. How could I have been so blind? Thank you Dan Brodribb. You are wise AND hilarious."

And she'll go on to be one of our closest friends and we'll get letters from her (REAL letters in flowing feminine script) updating us on her life and how much happiness she's found since she took my words to heart. And each year for the rest of our lives she'll send us a Christmas card from her, and Bastet and I will read them together, our eyes twinkling in our aged, weathered faces while a fire crackles warmly behind us in our cozy little house and then I will put my arm around Bastet and hold her close and I will be filled with a warm contented glow right up to the point I remember that NOTHING I WROTE IN THE LAST EIGHT PARAGRAPHS HAS ACTUALLY HAPPENED.

Yep. Still Dan Brodribb.

That's "Pretty Decent" Dan Brodribb to you.

I wouldn't be anyone else for the world.

1 comment:

Poetry of Flesh said...

I... am trying so hard not to burst into laughter at work with your imagery and dialogue and oh, god, do I love it.

And I completely expect an address sometime around Christmas (because I'll lose it if you give it to me anytime sooner) and you will receive the only Christmas card I will send this year just because of this post.