Wednesday, January 02, 2008

New headLINES and Pair of Singles. Also: The Hack Album

Dawn and I have our latest column up, containing our New Year's resolutions. Check it out here.

As well, headLINES is up here. This week it's my predictions for 2008.

Finally, my next Living article in the Journal will run this Friday. It's on sports.

One of my predictions is that I'm going to be a best-selling hip hop artist. Here's the lyrics to my first single, which is about the perils of the stand-up comedy game:

If you’re having laugh problems I feel bad for you son,
I got 99 problems, but this bit ain’t one

I got the hack patrol in the back, you know
Jokes that the haters want to say I stole
My critics all say “It’s easy laughs” Whoa
Too many words, sucka, these bits is gold.
If you bought a ticket to see my show
I’ll give you all I got plus a whole lot mo’
Loudmouth in the front trying to break my flow
He go, “Son, do you know what I’m hecklin you for?”
Cause your drunk and you’re fat and your IQ’s low
Do I look like Bill Cosby, sir? Shut your hole
Laugh, tip your waitress, show some love for the MC
keep your voice down I can hear you cause this ain’t TV
When you think the joke’s over--tag!--we ain’t done
I got 99 problems but this bit ain’t one.

Time to clear some space for my Grammy

No comments: